


Booty Call

by orphan_account



Category: Deadpool - All Media Types, Spider-Man - All Media Types, spideypool - Fandom
Genre: M/M, One-Shot, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-05
Updated: 2019-01-09
Packaged: 2019-10-04 17:22:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,541
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17308724
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: It wasn’t like Peter to do this sort of thing. He couldn’t really remember what this was called…. All he knew was that he was horny, and Wade was just a call or text away.





	1. Chapter 1

Wade sat alone in his old smelly studio apartment. All it had for furnishings were a TV, a table for said TV, a sofa he’d probably found on the side of the road and a mini fridge. If you asked him he’d say it was all he needed. But on nights like this, when he was alone watching Scooby Doo, he felt like it all looked like a pile of shit. 

He grabbed another beer out of the mini fridge; which was right next to the sofa I might add. He opened the bottle with a flick of his thumb and began to drink the thing. It was then that his phone pinged. He jumped in surprise. Not because it scared him, but because he didn’t think anyone actually held on to his number to text him. Wade set the beer on the floor before feeling for his phone under his legs, then between his legs, then standing up to see if he was sitting on it, then feeling for it between the cushions, and finally finding it under the sofa itself. He stood up and unlocked his phone as he plopped back down on the couch. The text was from Peter Parker, the Spider-Man. Now this was a surprise… All it read was ‘Hey.’ Wade cocked an eyebrow as he thought about this. ‘Why would Peter be texting me of all people? And why so late…’ He started to ramble on in his thoughts, thinking about ‘well he is on patrol and I’m sure he gets bored… but oh wait it’s 2 am wouldn’t he have gone in by now? How does patrolling a whole city, New York City for that matter, even work??’ He then realized he should probably respond. Wade thought about what he should say for another 5 minutes. He’d typing something out and then delete it… he did this over and over before finally he settled on a cool, ‘Hey’ in return. 

He tossed his phone aside and tried to focus on the TV in front of him, but he couldn’t seem to stop himself from glancing at his phone screen every few seconds or so. Finally after glancing at it for what felt like the hundredth time the text notification popped up. He quickly grabbed his phone to see it… 

‘What are you doing?’

‘What am I doing? No, shit! Don’t think about it just say….’ 

‘Nothing much. What are you doing?’

Another few minutes goes by… 

‘Sitting here…’  
‘You wanna come over? I’m kinda lonely.’

Wade tried to pretend like he hadn’t seen the text by not responding for a few minutes, so not to seem desperate or overly enthusiastic. He then said ‘Yeah that’d be chill.’ Despite trying to play it cool he couldn’t stop himself from getting very excited about going over to “hang out” with Peter Parker. 

As he was getting ready, and by get ready I mean searching desperately for a stick of deodorant through his various piles of shit, he thought ‘How did he even get my number?’ 

<><><><><><>

1 month earlier 

Peter ran into Wade on a roof of an abandoned apartment building during one of his nightly patrols. The mercenary seemed very excited about the encounter, asking for selfies and even an autograph. Peter couldn’t help but chuckle at the whole situation. As Wade was messing with his phone, undoubtedly trying to post one of the pics they took to his Instagram, he ripped his mask off so he could see his phone better. 

Peter was caught very off guard at Wade’s appearance. He couldn’t help but stare at the man's complexion. Wade noticed Peter’s gaze and blushed, muttering “I know. It’s gross… kinda permanent though. What can ya’ do right?” He laughed nervously.

Peter wanted to say ‘No, your scars are fine, but fuck… you’re kinda hot!’ But said instead, “Yeah, yeah I get it. We’ve all got scars.” 

After Wade got his picture posted and began to put his phone away Peter (very much panicking on the inside) stuttered out a “Oh wait! What’s your number? Us heroes gotta stick together!”

Wade stopped right where he was and stared right at Peter. ‘Fuck I shouldn’t have-‘

“BAH HA HA HA! That’s fucking great!!” Wade was doubling over with laughter. “Sure man, oh my god…. here,” Wade grabbed Peter’s phone and entered in his digits. “You’re fucking awesome you know that. Please don’t hesitate to call me man I’d love to hang out.” 

Peter only nodded and watched as Wade, trying to make a cool exit, jumped off the roof backwards, saluting Peter. Not ten seconds later a loud crash followed by a pained “Oooowwwww…” sounded from the alleyway below. Peter rushed to the edge of the roof only to see wade lying on his back in a dumpster. He gave the Peter a thumbs up and a weak “I’m okay~”

Peter shook his head and laughed. ‘What an idiot… a hot idiot… shit…!!!’

<><><><><><>

‘Oh right.’ Wade thought.


	2. Chapter 2

Peter found himself pacing back and forth in his apartment as he waited for Wade to arrive. When Wade asked for Peter's address, everything started to feel very real to him. He had just asked Wade Freakin Wilson, Deadpool, to come over... FOR SEX! Or well... he hadn't expressed the want for sex just yet but, it was on the agenda. 

<><><><><><>

Wade raced over on a motorcycle he had recently bought with the spoils from his last job. He had also changed out of his tight, sweaty suit and into jeans and a hoodie. And, yes; he did manage to find the deoderant, thank god. 

As he raced across town, Wade thought about what Peter had had in mind when he texted him. He really couldn't help it, sex did cross his mind as he drove. But Wade quickly shook the thought from his mind. 'Come on! Peter doesn't like /you/ like that!' Little did Wade know that all the way across town, Peter found himself agonizing over how he'd bring up that very subject. 

After only a short 15 what should've been 30 minute drive, Wade made it to the apartment complex. He parked the motorcycle and made his way up to the gate. He punched in the code Peter had given him and went inside. The outside seemed chic and modern and the inside seemed to only mirror this very clean aesthetic. This only intimidated Wade more. While in the elevator on his way up to Peter's apartment, Wade started to really think about what was happening. He started to sweat and his heart picked up in pace. 'This isn't anything to freak out over... Right!?' Before his mind could race any further, the elevator pinged signaling that he'd made it to the floor.

Wade could see Peter's door all the way at the end of the hallway. Room #47... Wade felt himself swallow hard before taking his first step down the seemingly endless hallway... 

 

<><><><><><>

Peter was finishing up recklessly throwing some dishes in the dishwasher in an attempt to tidy up when he heard a knock at the door. He stopped dead in his tracks for a second and stood straight up. "Uh- Coming!" he hollered. Peter consciously tugged at his t-shirt and swept is pants clean of invisible dirt as he went to the door. He grabbed the door knob and took a deep breath before opening the door for his guest. He smiled brightly, "Hey! It's so good to see you! Come in." Wade nodded and smiled back, clearly pretty nervous. This put Peter to ease knowing he wasn't the only one losing his shit over all this.  Peter directed Wade over to his living room as the two continued to exchange awkward glances. 

They sat on opposite ends of Peter's couch. Peter thought putting on some cartoons might help relieve some of the tension, but it only seemed to worsen things. 'Shit,' Peter thought, 'I should probably say something...' 

"Thanks for coming over so late and on such short notice." Peter directed his body over to Wade as he thanked him and crossed his legs. 

"Yeah man. Anytime." Wade smiled.

Peter nodded and smiled back... 'Okay now we're back on this awkward silence shit...' He decided it might just be best to be very very blunt about the situation and about what he wanted to do... He took a deep breath and repositioned himself so that he was facing away from Wade again. Peter felt his words begin to pour out when Wade suddenly asked "You got any booze?'

'Ohthankgod.' 

"Yes!" he exclaimed. 

Peter jumped up from the couch and went into the kitchen to grab four beers, two for each. He joined Wade back on the couch, this time sitting much closer. He passed Wade a bottle and put the other two on the coffee table in front of them. They cracked them open and took large swigs of the substance. Wade sighed in satisfaction and turned to Peter, "Much better," he added. 

Peter nodded in agreement. He leaned back into the couch clutching the beverage close to his chest. He continued sipping the drink, and soon felt the alcohol take effect. His chest got all warm and he started to relax...


End file.
